Justo Banya Death

Sauna-turned-apathetic nightclub Justo Banya Dush seems to have fallen in with wrong crowd in the past year. That is to say, no crowd at all. After a mega-impressive opening, Justo rested on its laurels as one of the самый закрытый (most closed-est) clubs in Moscow, never deigning to do the one thing it was supposed to do -- bring the party. Sad, but we have no one to blame but ourselves.

Gave it enough rope to hang itself with

We went out of our way to find its silly unmarked door. We stood in the cold when they couldn't find our name on the list. We paid 3,000 rubles for tables in an empty club. We made excuses to our friends for Justo's failure to perform. We all believed what we wanted to believe -- that it was the harbinger of new generation of Moscow clubs, cool not corny, where hoodies reigned supreme and hoochies were kicked to the curb.

Head tattoos? Really? As Chris Rock said, you can drive a car with your feet, that doesn't mean it should be done! (Also, you can't catch a crackhead in a footrace)

But alas, shuttered behind a steel door, the Great Hip Hope has turned into a haunt for pasty freaksi. Even TimeOut, a cheerleader for Moscow's elitny club scene, described the vibe at Justo as "melancholy." A great place for, like, wristcutters meetings.

"Down the road, NOT across the street, guys"

So these are photos from a White Trash For Cash party night at Justo. Now ask yourself, would you rather be drinking here, or in Bittsevsky Park, killing grounds of the Bittsevsky maniac? At least the latter don't have men in formal shorts.

"Rater, cruer worrd!" -- Justo

Justo Banya Dush, 3 Teatralny Proyezd, Metro: Teatralnaya, Tel. 625-6836

Photos: adensya.ru, mainpeople.ru