Neverland Ranch

When it's not occupied hosting concerts for aging divas whose stars fell in the rest of the world a long time ago (Gloria Gaynor, David Guetta), elitny megaclub Dyagilev can't resist a good theme party. Here's the Top 5 of the Fall 2007 club season. (Note: these aren't my made-up titles. Like a depraved creative writing summer camp, no theme is too abstract for a game of Let's Pretend at Dyagilev.)

1. "Betty Ford Clinic" (Nov. 9), in which all the skank nurses from Halloween night rise again.

2. "Candidate for President" (Nov. 4), in which Putin's Plan has something to do with bras and shitty techno.

3. "Seven Princesses and You Under a Blanket" (Oct. 26), in which I can only count six princesses. One must be suffocating under the blanket.

4. "Oxygen Boom" (Oct. 18), in which gusts of O2 send maidens into raptures.

5. "Rock & Roll Forever" (Oct. 12), in which the euro humps all other currency. No need to rub it in!

Photos: Geometria.ru