TKO KNK

Last month, Kak na Kanarakh (Like the Canarys), Park Kultury's sexy summer pool club, was on the cover of Time Out's "25 Best Verandas in Moscow" issue. On Wednesday, it was shut down by municipal authorities, probably for good, for not having the right zoning permits. Because you can't have a club that close to the river. Fair enough — who'd really want to eat and drink out by the Moskva? But never mind every other riverside establishment in the city...

Watch out! There's water behind you.

In fact, KNK did not grease the right palms greasy enough to earn the official legal status of "club." Two weeks ago, on their website, they began putting forth serious "we're not a club" damage control, based on Afisha's review of the place as a hot nightlife spot. Their arguments include:

• There's no feis-kontrol; the tables are just usually occupied, which is why people are turned away.
  
• Mr. Sergeyev and Mr. Magdi are not promoters, they are just people with pools. It's not their fault if people get drunk and party at their pools.
  
• "'Pre-party' and 'after-party,' in their Moscow understanding, as Mix and A Priori call themselves, KNK was not, is not and never will be. People don't dance at KNK, but spend time sitting, lying and swimming."

Not a club. Not a club. Not a club.

Didn't work, though. Pool's been drained; Afisha's pulled their article from their website; KNK has been "disappeared." Expect a similar fate for Solyanka, the hottest indie club that doesn't exist yet, on account of not having a permit. Somebody save Solyanka!




Environmental watchdog Oleg Mitvol personally closing KNK. Dick!

Photos: s-11.ru, afisha.ru, mixtura.org, 9linesmag.com

Kak na Kankarakh, Pushkinskaya Naberezhnaya, Metro: Park Kultury, Tel. 223-1758, www.s-11.ru
Solyanka, 11/6 Solyanka Ul., Metro: Kitai Gorod, www.s-11.ru